Paul Maden

I'm looking for a driving licence for my broomstick.

Whatever you do, don't run a hot bath in it. You've got to wobble it first.

I can't stop remembering myself with this blasted robot arm!

You could always try opening a fiend. With any luck it'll use a saw on the robot arm.

An old man sold me this rotten gas oven and I can't work it. What can I do about it?

Most people just cut them using a top-of-the-range Commodore Amiga, but that's not always as good as using an old-style sewer.

Torching my radio is more difficult than I expected. Can you help me out?

The best thing to do is sprinkle pepper over your radio's thin venier.

I can't stop turning myself with this rotten hair style!

The best thing to do is brand, with a hot iron, your hair style's larger stick.

Badvice On Demand…

You want more? No problem. Click the button below for extra Badvice.