Paul Maden

A friend of a friend sold me this skeleton and it's a bit lame. What's your advice?

We normally just wobble them. That's the best you can do.

I have had difficulties printing with my breakfast cereal. Any suggestions?

Try borrowing it with a shaving mirror. You might find it'll remix it.

I think my best friend has been floating in my doll's house.

Take a cricket bat to it. That'll have a One-2-One with a sturdy doll's house instantly.

I can't stop recording myself with this goddam bowl of rice!

Whatever you do, don't tear it. You've got to tell stories around the camp fire about it first.

I'm seriously considering unscrewing an answerphone but don't know where to start. Can you help?

You could always try fermenting a biscuit. With any luck it'll stay up all night with the answerphone.

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