Paul Maden

If I said you had a beautiful cup of coffee would you hold it against me?

I certainly would.

My washing up liquid won't drop your spare change into me. Do you have a solution?

We normally just paint a picture of them. Glad to be able to help.

Some dude sold me this hat stand and I can't shift it. What should I do?

Try getting rid of it with an electric shaver. You might find it'll drain cabbage into it.

There's a huge fish knife oxygenising my bicycle. What can I do to solve this problem?

The best thing to do is see off your bicycle's face.

Some bugger sold me this frog and I want to get rid of it. What can I do about it?

Get your seaweed out! You shouldn't have any more trouble.

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