This chap sold me this bloody Christmas tree and I think I've been done. How do I lose the thing?
We normally just order a drink from them. You shouldn't have any more trouble.
How do you find a toilet roll's power strip?
We normally just start a riot over them. That should put an end to your difficulties.
This bloke sold me this cheap partical accelerator and it's crap. What can I do about it?
First and foremost you must tear your partical accelerator's digital-analogue converter, and locate a decent overhead projector. If you manage that, use the overhead projector to tarnish the partical accelerator's chequebook. Usually you finish by scrubbing your partical accelerator's red wire with a type of lava lamp. Try it, and let us know how you get on.
There seem to be an awful lot of ways of catching a dressing gown, and it is very confusing.
Whatever you do, don't drink a toast to it. You've got to smear fingerprints all over it first.
I think my arch enemy has been submitting my breakfast cereal.
Most people just grow mustard and cress on them using a new model nit, but that's not always as good as using a suitable Goon Show compilation tape.
Badvice On Demand…
You want more? No problem. Click the button below for extra Badvice.