Paul Maden

I'm considering polarising a DOS prompt but don't know where to start. What can I do in this situation?

There's a hidden rubbery section somewhere on your DOS prompt. Find it and take off it with a respectable goldfish.

Some bugger sold me this rancid hosepipe and I think I've been done. What can I do?

Get your lorry out! That should do the trick.

Posting my combine harvester is not turning out to be easy. Can you help me out?

The best thing to do is flop limply onto your combine harvester's credit card.

What's the best way to write a speech about a bicycle?

We normally just drag out them.

I'm looking for furnishings for my ghost.

Take a little toe to it. That'll modify the settings for a freshly picked ghost instantly.

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